Create & project the Brand YOU!

Want to get that promotion, land that job, or just stand out in a crowd? Well what you need is, to create and project the brand you. And that is what an Image Consultant can help you do. Based on your short & long term life goals, an Image consultant can help you develop & project the image that can help you shine.

How confident you are, how well you make that presentation, how you dress in office, and for social dos, how you network with people, your leadership skills as well as social skills, your digital presence, your people handling skills etc are all part of your daily life and create a perception about you in the minds of others. That perception is what impacts, your career & your life.

An Image consultant helps you understand & navigate this world of perceptions that we live in. Be it office etiquette, making impact-full  presentations, public speaking, dressing and grooming (based on your height, body shape, industry, position, face shape, etc), networking, dining etiquette, and even social etiquette - s/he helps you understand and develop these skills.

Yes you do need to be good at what you do to succeed in life, and success comes with skills, hard work and passion. But hard work, passion and skills need to be seen and appreciated to be rewarded. People need to see it and appreciate these and you. Our lives - professional as well as personal, involve other people and it is their perception of you that counts at each step. Understanding your strengths, and building the right perception therefore is equally important.

So go ahead & connect with an Image Consultant today! Or Write to info@stellant.in

E-commerce in India - A simplistic perspective

Almost every day we read about how e-commerce companies in India are growing. How valuations are increasing with millions & billions of dollars being pumped in. How newer business models and e-commerce verticals are starting every day and getting funded. And how India is today a hotbed of e-commerce start ups and VC's.

We also read about questions being asked  - are these valuations justified? Is it another bubble? They are losing money on each sale so how long will they last?

I don't really think there is one answer for these and more such questions. And I am not a retail business expert or a financial wizard. What I do know is that finally - the success or failure of any business is also dependent to a large extent on the customer. Is it fulfilling a need? is it solving customer problems ? & is it delivering value to the customer? And a customer here is a buyer for some businesses and buyers and sellers for others (marketplaces).

Let's look at this - Flipkart is said to be currently clocking $4.5 billion in GMV (inclusive of Myntra), Amazon is said to be closing in on the $2 billion mark and Snapdeal is reported to have hit a sales run rate of $3.5 billion this month. Yes it's all GMV - gross merchandise value in e-commerce parlance. And yes they are making losses on every sale. But this increasing GMV in billions of dollars also means  - sales are happening, and increasing month on month for all players.

The important thing to note here - People are buying online. More and more people are buying more and more online and more and more people are selling more and more online. THAT I think is the key.

Someone may say - Oh! But they are buying because of the deep discounts. Yes that is also right. But that is just one of the reasons. The sharp increase in numbers over multiple players and categories over a period of time, does not happen just because of discounts. There is more to it.

When I ask people the fundamental question as to why they buy online I get varied answers, but probe further and it fundamentally boils down to 3 key reasons and they are
1) Price
2) Convenience
3) Choice

I say price because I see that people do factor in everything - discounts, competitive offers for the same products by multiple sellers, cost of commute, cost of time saved etc.

Convenience because people do value the ability to be able to buy anything from anywhere anytime, as well as get it delivered to their doorstep (and at times even on the day and time when they want it delivered). And that too, after reading reviews, and taking the opinion of their friends, family and then even sharing their choice with others after purchase. Then they can also easily return the items and get a refund if the item is not up to their expectation.

Choice because they can compare, items, features etc, and get the latest model, design or even a vintage piece, at the best price, and not be bothered if it is available in their vicinity, town or city or even country at times.

Sellers too are benefiting from the increased reach leading to a larger audience, and ease of collecting payments and delivering across the country that e-commerce has enabled.

So the questions to ask are : if we temporarily remove the price benefit to some extent (reduction in discounts), will people stop buying ? I don't think so because the other benefits are enough to keep existing customers online. Will a reduction in price benefit stop new customers from transacting online? It will definitely slow down the pace, but the other benefits are strong enough to keep customers coming.

Now assume there is a downturn tomorrow for whatever reason, and money flow trickles down and valuations drop drastically. What will happen? Customer acquisition due to discounts and price only benefits will reduce.  Those businesses that are currently investing in delighting the customer (choice & convenience) and not only in marketing (price discounts and advertising) will be able to ride out this period and still continue to grow. Some early stage companies at that point in time or others who are only focusing on offering a price advantage may have to shut shop.

Currently FlipKart, Snapdeal, Amazon, LocalBaniya, BigBasket, UrbanLadder, and a lot of the others, be it a marketplace or an e-retail business are using the discounting option to attract more and more new customers. However a lot of the millions and billions we see being pumped in these companies is being used for - Marketing, Price competitiveness, Warehousing, delivery, returns and tracking, and merchandising and technology. What is important is that how much is being spent for what and when. Finally what will decide who survives and who does not, will be on the basis of who is acquiring customers fast and also delighting them in all aspects, Price, Convenience & Choice and that too consistently.

E-Commerce as a business model is definitely here to stay, simply because of the benefits it brings to the customer . I don't think anyone can argue that. And e-retail in India by various estimates is less than or about 1% of the total retail business as of now meaning that there is still a lot of growth potential. A downturn can happen anytime due to many reasons and can't really be predicted. Valuations will grow in good conditions and shrink at other times. In my view it makes sense to use the high valuation good period to raise monies & use part of it to offer a price advantage and acquire customers, and the rest to build other business essentials. In a lean period the focus can be changed. In the long term, companies that focus on the customer first will survive a downturn or a market blip as that too is temporary.

Should you buy a fitness band or a Smartwatch ?

Everyone has their own reasons to buy a fitness band or a Smartwatch.  For some it's utility, others  it's fashion or flaunt value, and for some it's - well - just having it? For me it was trying out new technology to see if it helped & how.

I bought my first Fitness Band "FitBit Force" more than a year ago, and my "Pebble" SmartWatch a few weeks back  - Long after they were launched, & people were already using these or similar smart wearable. FitBit Force was soon recalled in the US (due to skin allergy complaints), but I could not return mine from here in India so I stuck with it.

So should you buy a fitness band or a Smartwatch or both? Well, here is my perspective.

Am not much of a fashion guy so, If you are planning to buy these for fashion or flaunt value or just for the love of technology - yeah sure go ahead. Choose what looks best - the shape, colour, brand and go for it. You really don't need to read any further.

Still reading? Well then here goes -

Fitness bands have a lot of features to help you monitor and manage your fitness levels. You can monitor steps taken, floors climbed, calories burnt, sleep quality, and some more. You can log events or activity, see graphs and charts, input calorie intake, weight, BP, Glucose etc.

On the FitBit Force, like some other bands, one has to add food intake manually (on your web account) to measure calorie intake. One, that is tedious, and secondly the preselection of food etc that's given, is mostly American/European so, you will need to input your own food items and nutritional value of each to log the same. Now I have no clue how to do that for something like a punjabi paratha or a neer dosa, and even if I could find out, the diversity of our food plus the different styles of cooking the same dish, would make it virtually impossible to be even close to accurate. (I mean how do you account for the one spoon of homemade butter, or 2 spoons of ghee or one spoon of coconut oil each time an item is cooked?)

Similarly you have to input your other activities such as gym exercise, or swimming or weight lifting, or yoga and the time taken for each and then trust the system to calculate the right amount of calories burnt or input those also manually, IF you know.

Floors climbed is nowhere near accurate and, if you travel in a car or bus over a flyover it counts it as floors climbed. On a particular day, it said I had climbed 102 floors!!!!!Really?

All other things such as heart Rate, BP or Glucose also have to be logged manually. So unless one is a sportsperson or fitness enthusiast, and has the inclination and the knowledge, or help, to do this, I don't think one would use those. All I ended up using after some weeks of trial were steps taken, sleep quality and the activity tracker to log my exercise. That's it.

Of this Steps and Sleep I can now monitor on my Pebble Smartwatch with a fitness app. Since I use Pebble and Fitbit both, I know that they are equally accurate.

What else? Well on the Smartwatch you can set alerts for your text messages, WhatsApp messages, mails, calls etc. You get to decide what apps from your phone you want to receive notifications for on your watch. Right on your watch display. Cool? Yes! Utility? Depends on the way you look at it.

From the way I see it, most men carry their Smartphones in their hand. So getting an alert on your watch from your phone, when your phone is in your hand, may really not be that great a benefit. Not for some people at least. And while Pebble allows you to send predefined (5) messages in response to messages right from your watch, well, you could just as well reply from your phone as it's in your hand. Yes, it is useful if your phone is in one room or you are in another or when you have to keep your phone silent in a meeting or party, but still want to make sure you get to know if that important mail or message or call comes. That's where it comes most handy for me.

Having said that, I must also say that for ladies, it may be different. Mostly ladies carry their Smartphone in their bags, hence getting alerts on the watch and not missing a call, or an important message could be useful. Also the quick response right from the watch could be handy.

The next Pebble that is due to come out soon "Pebble Time"  will, I believe, also allow you to send quick voice replies and take notes. Now THAT could be really useful. (One of the reasons I have pledged for it and backed it on Kickstarter).

Ok! what else? Well it has a lot of apps that you could use such as notes, news, health and fitness, games, Pandora and many others. Some are easy and quick to use and others take some getting used to. There are some that require "Companion Apps" on your phone to be able to use them. There are apps that let you control your phone camera from your watch too. So take your pick. And then there are multiple watch faces that you could choose from. Analog, digital, with weather etc etc.  Utility of all these? Well that depends on your personal priorities.

To answer another question I frequently encounter - "Why would you want to be continuously connected? " My answers is -" I don't. But when I do, then I would like to make sure I am. And when I don't, I shut off my Smartphone. Don't you?"

Overall, the Smartwatch phenomenon is still happening and there is a lot more to come. From better managing phone calls to taking photos to more intuitive interfaces, better looking designs, more companies in the fray and more app development is happening as you read this.

The Fitness band phenomenon too is still happening and there are now personal trainers that you can subscribe to when you buy the band (for an additional recurring fee of course), to help you monitor and manage your fitness better. There are now Fitness Bands from Indian Companies that would also help you track calorie intake etc better too.

In my opinion, if you are a fitness or sports enthusiast then a Fitness band will give you lots more in terms of logs and charts and reports. Else a Smartwatch would do fine for everyone else, as it would monitor fitness activities, plus mimic your phone for a lot of things. Similarly, if you tend to leave your phone in a bag or a room and still want to be able to monitor your calls and messages etc then a Smartwatch would be very useful. Else stick to your Smartphone for now till watches become even smarter.

Oh and before I forget, remember that all these items need to be charged. Regularly. So charge your phone, charge your power bank for the phone, charge your fitness band, charge your watch.......  To give you a perspective, when I bought my current Smartphone it needed to be charged every second day, now after a few months, it needs daily charging. Fitbit needed to be charged every 12 to 14 days earlier, and now after a year it needs to be charged every 10 to 12 days. The Pebble watch I use needs charging after about 7 days depending on usage.

And last but not the least, am I happy with both my devices? Yes. Are they useful? Yes. Will I discontinue using one? Yes.

Do comment me your views or fell free to ask questions if any.

And now an App Store for Kids!!!

About an year back I was standing in one of those loooong never ending lines at the Passport office to get my passport renewed, brooding about how in spite of technology and online application etc one still had to stand in long queues to ultimately get things done. Brooding done, I got to doing what I did, in most such circumstances.... observing People. As always, most were glued to their cell phones...doing something or the other.

And then there was this small boy (must have been around 4 to 5 years old) who had come in with his mother and while she was waiting her turn in the line, he was busy running around the lines climbing on the bench, jumping down, making noises etc etc. Seeing the looks from people who seemed quite unhappy from being disturbed from their cell phone screens, the mother tried scolding him, making him stand with her while tightly clutching his hand but he clearly didn't quite like the idea. So he started making even louder noises. Then his mother took out her cell phone, put on a game and gave it to him. That did it. Worked like a charm. He took the phone, went to the bench and sat quietly on the corner playing the game for the next 30 minutes. And people got back to burying themselves in their cell phone screens.

That reminded me of how I had seen this happen at homes, in the super market, buses and all sorts of places. Want the kids quiet and out everyone's hair? Put on their favorite TV show or game or video on the nearest screen, be it the TV, Tablet or Cell phone and voila! Job done.

Yes, I know how a lot of us - specially those brought up in the era of no TV, or single channel TV, and land lines that mostly dialed wrong numbers, don't quite agree with the idea of children spending so much time in front of or with back-lit screens. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends against any media exposure before the age of 2. And like any other research while some says the exposure is bad even later, others show how playing games etc increase hand eye coordination among kids etc etc.. There are studies new and old and articles on it and those interested can read some of them here...
http://hamptonroads.com/2014/04/study-more-screen-time-leads-fussier-children
http://www.wired.com/2014/10/video-game-literacy/
http://www.pbs.org/parents/childrenandmedia/article-faq.html
http://news.stanford.edu/news/2013/march/games-education-tool-030113.html
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/01/children-tv-exposure-study_n_1923719.html?ir=India
http://www.usnews.com/news/articles/2013/11/26/how-virtual-games-can-help-struggling-students-learn
http://www.cbsnews.com/news/background-television-at-home-may-be-harming-us-kids-development/
http://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/Pages/Kids-in-U-S-Exposed-to-4-Hours-of-Daily-Background-TV.aspx

But l am not here to pass any judgement on this as am not an expert, and, that's not the point of this blog.  Let's face it. Children today are exposed to more and more digital devices and also seem more quick to learn to use these and are in fact at times more adept to learning how to use them than most of us. Struggling how to use the new cell phone, or remote or computer or any other digital device? ask the nearest kid and they will sort it for you. 

Most parents I spoke to, limit the usage. They keep the exposure moderate ensuring kids get enough of other real life exposure too. 

So one can limit time for ensuring moderation, but what is actually more difficult, is to moderate content. It's not only 'How much' but also 'What' that's important and that needs to be monitored. What are the kids doing? what are they watching? What are they getting exposed to? Is it helping in any way? Is it harmful? What is appropriate for what age? The "What" question needs parental intervention and lots of time.

The kid at the passport office was playing a game on the cell phone but the game most likely was pre-selected by his mother. At some point the mother or the father would have searched for the right content, screened it, judged if it is appropriate for the kid and then saved or downloaded the same for their kid.  And I thought WoW!!!  Parents today have it a lot tougher than our parents. There are Millions of videos on You Tube and videos, games & apps on the app stores. Hats off today's parents who can search, view, judge appropriateness and download content and then monitor its usage too!!!! Means... come on!!! I find it difficult to search and find the right apps for myself given the sheer numbers out there. And to do that for a kid would mean being much more vigilant and in the know!!! These parents must be super Dudes!!! Or Super Dads and Moms. And I guess they are.

A few months later I was meeting my friend and CEO of one of India's leading Mobile Media companies. Knowing that he was the father of two small kids, I asked him if he was a super dad too. He said "Oh!! That's why we are developing India's first app store for kids." (You can read his blog on this here) And my immediate response was "App store for Kids??? Really???"  He explained that it was not really for kids but for parents to be able to find age appropriate, videos, games and apps for their kids, that would not only help entertain but also educate kids. Not only have they gathered all kinds of content from around the world but they also took on board some experts to help segregate the content based on age and learning areas. The store I believe is now launched and has scores of content just for kids up to the age of 6.

The Greek philosopher Plato was right, again  - Necessity is the mother of invention. So for all you super Moms & Dad's out there, Appystore.in is here to help you.

Would love to hear from parents on their experience with kids and technology and their views on the same. Do write in your comments and share.

How to select the right digital agency for your business

Selecting a digital agency that is right for your business is one of the key factors that can help determine your success. So you have your product or service you want to market, ready, and you are all set to go Digital. You know there are many agencies out there with varied expertise and you now have to decide which ones to call for a meeting and then, on what basis to select from them. Chances are your existing offline or traditional agency too, now has a digital arm or sister concern, and for various reasons you may be wanting to talk to them too. But how do you decide which ones to call and how do you go about determining which one is right for your business?

So let's try and put down some simple pointers to help you along the way. Let's start with the basics.  First, before you even start searching for agencies, make sure you know the following - 

• why you are going digital, 
• who are you going to target and 
• what you want to achieve in the long and short term.

Have practical answers to these ready and written down. The reason am saying this here, right at the beginning, is that many a times I see businesses wanting to go digital because - everyone is, or their competitors are, or it's the cool thing to do, or because the youth in their family are all hooked to mobiles and the internet etc. While those are all good reasons to think seriously about digital, that is not the reason to go digital. The reason has to something tangible - increase sales by 'x' times, improve customer retention by 'y' percentage, or improve customer service by 'z' percentage or increase brand awareness to a desired level, or target a new audience, or do research, etc.

That's the reason you will notice in the beginning I said "....One of the key factors that can help determine your success" and not 'The only factor for success'. Know this right at the beginning, as the agency can only help you achieve what you want to, as you know your business, your audience and your goals best. An agency can help you chart the right path, implement and monitor. There is a lot that can be done in Digital. Website, WAP site, SEO, SEM, Display advertising, Affiliate program, Social marketing, Social Advertising, Blogs, Webinars, Podcasts, Mobile marketing, Apps, etc. The product or service is yours, the target audience is yours, and you will need to deliver and retain. The agency can only help you along the way to do some or all of this.

Based on the why, who and what above, you can now decide what expertise you are looking for in the agency. e.g. If its product sales you want to achieve, you may want to look at agencies who have proven strengths in SEO, SEM, Affiliate marketing, Re-targeting etc. Or if its branding then maybe display advertising, social media strengths etc. Yes, most agencies will cover all areas and you may need to do everything but if you have a focus, then you will look at agencies that excel in those parts more than the others. Hence 'right' for your business and not necessarily the 'best' out there overall.

So now you know which agencies to start talking to - who have expertise and proven strengths in the areas you are looking to focus. Get in touch, give them your brief based on the why, who and what above and get them to present.

Now when they come in - what else do you look for and how do you select which one to go with. Here are a few pointers

• Have they been able to present some sort of a strategy and road map? It would be broad because all they have is your brief, but does it cover all the key areas? Or have they come with a standard template showing their strengths and no strategy tailor made for your business whatsoever.
  
• Have they done this or something similar before? And here, you just don't need to go by what they say. You can look up their success with some simple searches and by reaching out to a few people on the Internet itself such as LinkedIn etc. If they are a new agency then what is the knowledge and experience level of the team.
  
• Most importantly do they have the right team for you? So what is important here is to meet the people who are going to be handling your business and not just the boss or the account manager. How much experience does this execution team have in the exact areas you want to focus? This is important, and specially so in India where a lot of Digital agencies are relatively new, and while the top honchos may have a wealth of experience, the executing team maybe a bunch of freshers learning at your expense. So make sure the team working on your account has the right experience / credentials required.
  
• Next, what tools do they use to implement and monitor. There are free tools with limited features and paid tools that let you do a lot more, and some agencies have developed tools of their own while some newer agencies are still doing most things manually. Know what tools they are using related your focus areas and their level of expertise on the same. Know the features and the limitations of these tools. See the reports from these tools. Does it give you all you need to know to be able to best implement your goals?  Also is their reporting live and will you have access to the same in real time?
  
• What systems and processes do they follow? This is important as even with the right tools, a lot of implementation and fine tuning is manual, and there need to be checks and balances within the agency, so that a newbie does not by mistake post something that could be damaging for the brand, or execute a paid campaign without the right targeting and burn your money.
   
• And last but not the least, are they in a position to grow with you and have the ability to scale as your business scales?

I have only listed a handful of basic but important points above. There are more areas to look at and look into, but if you get the above few right, then chances are, you are on the right track, and the rest will come to you automatically as you engage with them during the selection process. So get started and if you have any questions please feel free to comment below and ask. If you have already been through the process and have some pointers that could help others, please do share.

Digital marketing - Change is the only constant

As technology changes and evolves, it enables better interactivity, more personal conversations, better targeting, deeper analytics, and more. While that is happening, newer digital channels and marketing avenues emerge, and so do ways of doing what we did yesterday, even better. Existing platforms are constantly changing their algorithms and rules, as they add features and functionality, and even newer platforms that are engaging people better or focusing on a niche are coming up.

With the proliferation of digital devices and platforms, newer potential customers are now reachable, while existing ones are becoming more fickle, have shorter attention spans, and are becoming more demanding. Push is giving way to pull and marketing is getting more and more real time, continuous and even more interesting.

To succeed, Digital Marketers need to simultaneously know, learn, adapt and evolve - constantly. While email still works, more and more opens are happening from the mobile, websites have to be responsive so that they can be easily viewed from any device, landing pages have to keep in mind the ease of filling forms from a handheld device and conversations are happening more and more on newer mobile messaging platforms .

Analytics now has to track engagement and user flow based on device and OS along with time of day, their social interactions and the increasing number of channels they use. As traditional advertising majors acquire or build digital expertise, companies & brands too are looking for truly integrated use of offline and online in their campaigns. So offline marketers have to grasp digital and vice versa.

Yes, these are challenging and yet exciting times for Marketers. Challenging because they have to constantly learn and adapt to the new while improving on what they already know and exciting because with new developments in technology they can now do their jobs even better and deliver better results.

As all this happens the most common mistake a Digital Marketer can make, is to give more and more attention to the new, while repeating what worked earlier on the old. Also as we get more and more analytics based, we tend to at times forget the basics and the human element in it all. So let us jot down some essentials a Digital marketer should remind himself/herself everyday to ensure success.

First we should constantly remind ourselves the 3 key things that make Digital so unique.

• It's Interactive
• It's Measurable
• It's Constantly evolving

Second - know your consumer or your target audience. Yes this too changes, as newer devices and technology and engagement channels are bringing a whole new audience to the fore that we may have not considered earlier. While free mobile messengers rule the urban audience, SMS and that too in local language (very important from the Indian perspective) is being used more and more by the rural audience. While channels such as Play Store or iTunes or YouTube are used by the young upwardly mobile from tier 1 & 2 cities to access content via WiFi or 3G,computer to mobile via cable or Bluetooth enabled device to device sharing of videos and audio is a rage among people in smaller towns and cities.

Third is to have a definite strategy and to rethink on the same at least every quarter. Use analytics to gauge the effectiveness of your strategy and then fine tune, modify, change, test and start again.

And finally always remember to be human in your interactions. Whether you are using email or SMS or a Video or a text ad or banner or building an affiliate program, don't forget that while technology handles the back end, its humans you are reaching out to. And humans like to interact with humans, buy and sell from humans and share and listen to humans. While automated messages and email responses and SMS replies and voice messages still have their use, it always works better if the customer or target audience knows there is a person at the other end. Automate the process, automate the analytics, automate the back end, but keep your messages and interactions as human as possible. Engage, listen and respond. People will listen to you more, tell you more, engage with you more, buy from you more, give you genuine feedback if you have an automated back end but a human front end.

While we are focusing on the online here, the same holds true for all marketers. And Clients or Companies or Brands. While the basics remain the same, a lot else has changed and is changing constantly. We need constant ideation, knowledge of what's new & re-definition of our target audience and our strategy. We need to constantly upgrade our skills, our teams, our systems and processes and then change again.

Are you listening?

How much do we listen? I mean 'really' listen. Listening is a part of our daily life but something we do less and less. Listening is more important than talking - we do have two ears and one mouth. But - We don't really listen much. As we go about our daily routines, submerged in our mobile phone rings and pings, and one way conversations with friends, family, colleagues and everyone else, some of which we even call as discussions, the one thing we do less and less is to listen.

And why am I writing a post on this? Well answer this - Do we want to create better impressions, make lifelong friends, keep our spouse happy, grow in our careers, impress our Bosses, lead teams to success, grow businesses etc, etc? Chances are you are saying - Yes! If so then learn to listen. One of the fundamental lessons in life is - to learn and grow - first listen. 

I started my career in sales and one of the first things I learnt was that, to be able to sell better, - one needs to listen better. Listen to potential customers, listen to the existing customers, listen to bosses and colleagues. So l listened and I learnt. I did pretty well in sales (if I may say so myself) and one of the reasons was that, I was a problem solution salesperson, I was an emotional salesperson, I was a price driven salesperson, and every other type of salesperson there could be - based on listening and who I was selling to, what I was selling, where & when. My sales strategy stemmed from listening well and applying that in conjunction with other things relevant.

Later on as I moved to marketing and then to running and managing businesses, the one thing that has helped me the most is to listen.

Even in daily life, whether it is with family or with friends or out in the market dealing with shopkeepers, or in the streets getting a taxi driver to go where you want to go, listening works as it helps us to communicate better and that helps in getting things done better.

Now, I am not perfect, and I still make the mistake of talking without listening at times. We are so eager to be heard and to say what we want to say or to make an impression that we forget that the key to getting heard is not to talk and talk and talk, but to listen and listen and then talk and then listen again. Whether it's our professional or personal life, what will get us to learn and solve problems and grow as Individuals and leaders is our ability to listen first and then talk or not talk. At times when you listen well, you realize that talking is not always necessary.  You can get more done by talking less and listening more. It is not imperative to let the other person know you also know something about the topic. You don't have to have the solution to every problem. Sometimes listening itself is a solution.

Easier said than done. Most of us like to talk and hear the sound of our own voice. Just try and recall someone telling you about a conversation they had with someone else. Mostly it would be - I told her this and then I told her that. How many times does this person actually tell you what the other person was saying? Mostly never. The reason is not that the other person wasn't talking but because this one wasn't listening. Now suppose the other person comes to you and tells you about the same conversation - the same thing happens. She too wasn't listening but only talking. It's happening around us all the time. We all talk about how a person is very successful because they can really speak well or is a good orators. But in reality if this person is really successful, you will see they are also great listeners. Some very successful people in fact do not talk much but they listen very well.

A conversation is when two people talking. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conversation - "Conversation is a form of interactive, spontaneous communication between two or more people who are following rules of etiquette. It is polite give and take of subjects thought of by people talking with each other."

And http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Listening - "Listening is often confused with hearing. While hearing is a biological process that can be scientifically explained, listening is a neurological cognitive regarding the processing of auditory stimuli received by the auditory system. Hearing is always occurring, most of the time subconsciously. Listening is the interpretative action taken by the listener in order to understand and potentially make meaning out of the sound waves."

Why give conversations or listening so much importance? Well it's because the better we are at listening the more we learn, the better we can converse & communicate and solve problems and be heard. Ah! There it comes again - Be heard. Yes it does. To be heard and then to be listened to - means what you say is relevant and makes sense and is important enough. For what you are saying to be relevant & make sense - you should know the topic, the intention, the current perspective and, the people who are part of the conversation, and then, articulate your thoughts well. To do that first you have to listen and understand. The more you listen the more you learn about the people, the topic, the perceptions etc, and the more you know, the better you can talk about it or not ;-)

So when to speak, what to speak, how to speak to be heard, all depends on how well you listened. Think of all the successful people you may have met who are well respected and looked up to. If you observe them you will notice they listen more than they talk.

Try it today. Try and be patient and listen. Listen to your Boss (I know we all do but this time really listen, don't just hear him/her), your colleagues, your boyfriend, girlfriend, wife (yes her too), husband, the child, parents, the customer, and everyone else. Not selective listening - where you listen to only what you want to hear, but listen to what they are saying. And it will change your perspective and you will realize, you now know them a bit better, and can interact with them better. Just imagine if you did this every day, and the impact it can make in your life. It's not the easiest thing to do, but, if you are conscious of it, and make listening a habit, you will be the gainer in the long term and short term too.

Being a good listener is an important part of improving our overall communication skills, and will write a post on communication skills too sometime soon. Meanwhile would love to hear of your experiences on listening and conversations. Please comment below and share your opinions and experiences on the same.